This post and all others have been moved to this sites new home on www.peterneill.eu
As anyone who knows me will testify to, I have a knack of getting myself into bizarre situations. People have often told me that I should start writing them down, so finally I am. Warning do not continue unless you are prepared to loose all respect for me!!
Let me share one little incident:
Picture this, I'm the IT guy working for a small finance firm of about 100 people in Dublin. One day I am asked to carry a large table from downstairs to an office upstairs. Sounds normal so far. Well once I eventually lunge the awkward object upstairs I go about setting it down very carefully, bending my knees as much as possible as I set it down in its final resting place.
While this maneuver is happening the MD and the Head of Finance wander out of a meeting room and are greeted with a view of my behind, however as they witness this gigantic sight, a horrific sound is heard, and large rip is witnessed and the wonderful expanse previously hidden from the world by court order is exposed to their sensitive eyes.
I at this point panic, I feel the rip, I look down and in my upside down view of the of the world behind me witness the astonished eyes of the managing director and the head of finance. Then I suddenly realise that my view is framed by my new pair of boxer shorts, covered in sheep.
I struggled to think quickly, I shook the trousers off my feet, as they were entirely ripped, I take of my t-shirt (the only thing I am wearing on top) and wrap it around my waist. I now make it with great speed and little grace down the corridor wearing only my runners, a pair of boxers and a t-shirt around my waist. I reach the stairs, pass several staff members, leaving them in a daze, head downstairs and out the door while leaving a stunned security guard behind me.
At this point I am standing in the middle of a business park, I remember there is a taxi rank outside the business park and up the road. I dash toward the entrance passing yet more security guards, out the gate and then can see the rank up the road with a few taxis in waiting to my joy. On the final leg of my run, I run past the entrance of what should obviously be my home, a mental hospital with heavy gates and extremely high walls. Finally I jump into a cab and ask the simply stunned driver to take me home. Thank God he did.